Tuesday, 21 July 2015

The Great Friend Hunt

Having recently moved back to Nottingham with my young family, after leaving fifteen years ago, I'm reaping the benefits of being closer to family - we even had our first date night in, well, forever on Saturday!

But with that benefit comes the downside of moving away from my friends and having to make new ones.  I'm not looking for a new BFF, just companionship; someone to share a piece of cake with whilst our babies play and we discuss poo (that's what mums do!), someone to go for a walk with, invite over for a coffee, just to chat with.  Y'know, mummy friends.  A few drinks in town without the men folk.  A few drinks with the men folk.  A proper friendship born out of having something n common and enjoying each others company.  I've joined baby groups, play groups, swimming lessons, but my days are getting a little lonely.



But I got to thinking this morning as I got a text from one of my closest friends, and a Facebook message from another over night - it's amazing where you find your friends and never where expected.  They never come along when you think you need them, and always when you aren't looking for them.

And so, introducing my Besties, and where they came from:

Ellen, the bravest woman I know (not to mention the slimmest - cow).  We met whilst waitressing at a wedding one summer whilst we were at (different) Uni's.  We felt sorry that no one was dancing at the wedding, so we took a chance and started it all off with a little dance off of our own.  The bride and groom loved it, the party got started and we've been absolute firm friends ever since.

Tessa, my Uni friend who lives in Reading.  We met in the most natural way possible; at university, on the same course.  Our friendship has lasted us never living in the same town since and although we don't speak often anymore (we're both busy mums), I'd never be without her and know she is always on the end of the phone if I need her.

Nat, my husbands friends wife (at first).  I love her and her ghetto booty.  We met at my brother-in-laws wedding and bonded over a shared hate of sleeping outdoors; We're now closer than our husbands are, who were friends before us.  She's the girl who will ALWAYS stick up for you, but will tell you later you're wrong (if, indeed, you are).  She is one of the most loyal people I've ever met, with the strongest will.

Joe and Jan (come as a pair!), our old neighbours, who have just moved to Canada (sob!).  Their adorable children are older than ours, so it's not that that bonded us.  I'd say it was a shared love of New Zealand wine, and husbands who are middle class but will fight it to the end, with their shared love of being a Manc.  My WORD I miss them and our many a random evening drinking on the patio.

Lou, the friend I have the most stories about, who moved to Australia ad few years ago and shows no signs of ever moving back.  We barely speak, the odd email here and there; we're both crap at keeping in touch.  If I needed something she wouldn't be the first I'd call, and I wouldn't be her first either.  We see (and speak) to each other about once a year.  But there will always be a shared bond and I absolutely adore her.  I just wish she'd get on and get married so I have an excuse to get my ass out to Oz!!

I've reminded myself here that friendships don't have to be years old to count.  They can survive the miles and being in close proximity which is sometimes harder - if I had to live with Ellen I'd surely kill her (and her me!).  These friendships are like my family and even though they aren't near by, I can't just see them for a cuppa and I'm missing my God Children's firsts, I know that whatever happens, I'll always have them in my life.

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